"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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