Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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