You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
