lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
