i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
My vagina just recognized that song.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
