do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
