He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
