a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
