Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
The air taste purple.
Randomize
