dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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