Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Randomize
