Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
