He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize