I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize