I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize