I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
