so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize