Having a random hookup so left but love u
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
