I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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