You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
