White coat. Heels.
I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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