i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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