Your mouth is God's brothel.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
