do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
