I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
