I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
