my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize