just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Randomize
