Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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