please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
now i know why i became what i already was.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
