we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I intend to get homeless drunk
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
