Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
