Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Randomize
