their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Randomize
