Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
