He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Randomize