just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
