i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
im holly from the hills drunk
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize