I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
