Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
