Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
