I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
