don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
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