am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
