no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize
