idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
