On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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