fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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