I'm drive I can fine osifer
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Randomize
