I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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