i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Randomize
