Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
God I need to hump something, right now.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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